The Bumpy Ride of Feelings
It has been hard to write over the past few weeks - much easier to avoid it and fill my time with other things, including mindless distractions. And now that my chemo treatments have started - I am zapped of a lot of energy and working through managing side effects each day. The emotional reality though is that the past few weeks and last month have been really difficult. I feel that I have had a huge range of emotions to acknowledge and process. I have felt pretty numb emotionally for some time - my therapist recently challenged me to list the losses and changes that I have faced in the past 2 years - didn't take long for that numb feeling to disappear!! Some of the changes have happened because life happens - my kids have graduated from high school and young adult life is the norm. Their lives are changing and evolving and so my role in their lives is changing as well. That is a hard one to swallow at times - I am not needed in the same way and my influence and control...